Well, my wonderful mom passed away peacefully this afternoon, just before 5:30pm (Sunday, May 22nd).
For the past four days mom was pretty much unconscious. Heavily sedated with morphine,etc. Last night her breathing changed and got very labored and "rattly". There are four siblings in my family, and three of us were with mom all day. I knew mom was not going to let go until my brother "H" got there because mothers do not like to leave loose strings. H was in Italy, and he flew pretty much non-stop around the world to the west coast of Canada... He walked into mom's room where we were all waiting for him. I leaned over and said to mom, "Mom, H is finally here!" The missing brother sat down on the bed beside mom, and gave her a hug, then he took her hands in his and leaned forward and said a few words to her... Her breathing immediately changed from that terrible labored sound to shallow and soft, and she was gone... just like that. The missing puzzle piece was in place, and she went very peacefully.
So, there you go.
I'm feeling pretty peaceful about everything right now, and am just so glad mom no longer has to put up with nursing home crap anymore.
No more sitting in a wet diaper every day.
No more being confined to a wheelchair.
No more being put to bed "according to the rules of the facility," and being told when to eat and what to eat.
No more bland food.
No more ghastly lukewarm tea and weak coffee.
No more painful arthritis to stiffen her body.
No more endless side effects from medication.
No more struggling to communicate... no more frustration over the inability to make even the simplest of sentences.
No more damned dementia.
Fly free, my darling mom. I love you.
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And I don't even know where to begin to thank my Atop family for all your wonderful messages of support. I'm so fucking tired right now I feel like I've been run over by a truck or something, but I read every message in yesterday's thread, and all the wonderful PMs in my inbox, and just feel overwhelmed and weepy. Thank you, everyone... from the bottom of my heart.
It'll take me a day or so to get back into my regular squee/flail mode... right now about the only thing I can muster is a teeny tiny little squee after seeing all the drop-dead gorgeous pics posted in yesterday's thread.
this is me right now---->
Tomorrow I'll have to consult with my siblings about a memorial service and a lot of other "death business," then start packing up all my mom's things from her room at the care home... When all of that's done, I'll be back to flail.
Love you all so much!!!
