newnation.sg/2016/01/entire-spore-turned-gay-after-watching-adam-lambert-perform-on-celebrate-2016-countdown-show/
Entire S’pore turned gay after watching Adam Lambert perform on Celebrate 2016 countdown show
Posted on 01 January 2016
They should have heeded the warning of highly religious Singaporeans.
The entire nation of Singapore turned gay on Dec. 31, 2015, mere minutes before the arrival of the new 2016 year.
This after Singaporeans from all walks of life watched renowned American gay singer Adam Lambert perform live for the Celebrate 2016 countdown show, which was broadcast on national television.
As a result of witnessing the event, all Singaporeans have become gay immediately.
One Singaporean, Tong Xing Lian, said he was half-expecting this to happen, but wasn’t sure if it would really come to pass: “I should have heeded the warning of highly religious Singaporeans when they warned about the effects of watching Adam Lambert perform in public.”
“Now I am completely, utterly gay, there is simply no turning back to my straight ways, having been convinced the gay way is the only way.”
Singaporeans who witnessed the transformation of their own sexual orientation attributed the changes to Adam Lambert’s dress sense and dance moves.
One other local, Wei Tua, said: “Adam Lambert was at his most provocative this evening. He was decked out in a top that was as large as a bedsheet, baggy pants and slippers.”
“These are the hallmarks of a provocative liberal gay agitator. This was exactly what the highly religious Singaporeans warned us about.”
“We have no choice but to live with our gay identity as a nation from now on.”
