The Moon Garden Lounge

Hello.
It's hard finding the way to the 'MoonGarden'! I had to slink around the site for awhile.
Here I am.

I wanted to reply to everyone who's commented on the 'Adam Birthday Celebration' we had in SF on Sunday; but we've moved on from there. And yet, in a way, I haven't.

So! This is the reason for my post! It doesn't need to be on the regular thread, where we're celebrating the 'We are Family' performance. BTW, Adam, his gorgeous presence, his overwhelming aura and persona, his out-of-this-world voice, his happiness . . . captured an essential, pure moment in time. Everyone there was enthralled! Adam was, too!! What a great cause; what a great venue and way to launch our next 'era'. So much more to come! The magnificence of Adam hits me like a ball in the face. We have no idea of what we are going to experience in the years to come. We can't imagine! Already, I cannot believe it was four years ago I first heard that voice; felt that feeling.

Onto that 'feeling'.
On December 16, I was at the VH1 Divas performance. Spectacular! Beyond words - his beauty; his excellence; his confidence.

I have to backtrack.
I've been traveling to Oregon - an 800 mile round trip - every couple of weeks, for over a year. My mother was disabled, and failing slowly. Adamrocks - an angel I met through Adamtopia - would send me CDs of Adam's music, and other music she loved, to help me pass the time on I-5. I'd leave these CDs with my mom; who truly loved Adam. As I look back, part of her love might have been because she loved me. It was harder and harder for her to see and hear.
One of the tracks Adamrocks sent me was Madonna's 'Ray of Light'. Back in the eigthties and nineties I didn't listen to music. I was so busy with my boys; and I was back in school, becoming an RN. Where had I been, I wondered - to have missed this song that spoke to me?

On December 16, I was only a few feet from Adam as he came onto the stage. He looked quickly around, missing the 'feed' but beginning the dance. In video, we can see, really see the moment he found the music.
I replay this performance every day, it seems. He came to the stage and was lost. He kept on. He found his voice and then he soared. With a song that speaks to me. And to my mother.

My mom died just a few hours after Adam sang 'Ray of Light'.

A few days later, returning to Adamtopia, I saw that a ninja had found the source of the tunic 'hoodie' Adam wore.
I went to the site, and good god, bejessus, the designer purchase cost was outrageous. End of story, so I thought.
My darling husband - oh, yes, he really is this wonderful - unbeknownst to me, tried to find a seamstress in our little town to 'copy' the tunic - but then, I went online again and saw that I could purchase the last tunic in the designer's collection at 41% off.
I did it. I purchased it, online, from Antwerp, Belgium. Didn't try it on. Had no clue.
But I had to have it, you see. It was my ray of light - my memory - my mother.

I've worn it twice. It is beautifully made, and it feels so soft. It envelops me.

When I was little, I used to think I lived under my mother's chin. Now, I hug myself and I feel the warmth of this tunic and I hear Adam reassure me that 'quicker than a ray of light, she's flying'.

She is free of her broken body. She is home.

Aw, momtomany, that was beautiful!

I hope to be the kind of woman in this part of my life to my adult children that your mother seems to have been to you; one who decides to explore and find joy in the people and things that give her children that same joy. Shared joy and passion create such strong bonds. There is so much choice in loving.  Some of it comes from being open to new things and allowing yourself enough time to develop familiarity and then real understanding of them.

Adam has been a real catalyst in allowing me to learn these things.  Four years ago, because of Adam, I re-discovered the joy of new music.  I began listening to new genres and new artists and learning more about the music industry at large.  This coincided with my own son moving into that business and beginning to chart his own career in it.  My son and I began to connect more than ever as we discussed music and as he sensed my genuine interest and growing passion for it.  From there, our connection deepened and grew.  I began to appreciate and love his nu-disco dance music and not just his ballads, lol.  I began to get it, and so to get him, in a richer and more full way.  I will always be grateful to Adam for this.

A few nights ago, at my son's label private show/party he invited me to in the very hip part of east L.A., my son warmly (and proudly!) introduced me to all his uber cool indie music friends and label people, and we all talked music and life together, and yes even Adam Lambert as he introduced me to the AOL music sessions guy who got me my Adam Lambert personalized set list autograph, lol.  I felt completely at ease and comfortable and welcome.    And when I finally got back home, exhausted in the very wee hours of the morning, I received a text from him thanking me for coming, telling me that his friends were glad to finally meet the "cool" mom he was always talking about.  

This made me smile and laugh out loud.  Leila Lambert I am not.  I am just me.  But thanks partly to Adam Lambert, I am owning that.

That is so cool!  I love picturing you with your robin.  

I didn't see that story but I absolutely love it as I love this awesome gif.  Sigh.  Just love this place.