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Post by kathleenpf on Aug 2, 2011 12:19:50 GMT -5
My daughter is one of these. She is in a wonderful relationship with a wonderful man, right now. She has hinted, to me, that she is not interested in having children. She is really into dogs!  With that in mind, I can completely see she and her guy not getting married. In my old age, I have come to the conclusion that unless you want children, getting married just isn't a big deal anymore. May I add my story to this. I'm not young (I'm 52) and in these days everyone was married. I never thought of marriage as a big deal. The only reason I got married was cause my MIL said she would be ashamed to walk in public if we didn't get married in a church. Even my mother was OK with my decision. And my marriage was held in the most simple way. And now my daughter who is in a relationship for 8 years now, feels the same as me. She feels marriage adds nothing to her relationship and I happen to agree. No big deal. JMHO. ITA, gelly. I've been married 23 years and we did it simply - a Justice of the Peace and a witness. But, honestly, if we had to do it today, we probably would skip even that. A marriage license didn't validate our relationship, we did. |
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Post by thespindleshay on Aug 2, 2011 12:21:40 GMT -5
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ilovehawaian
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Post by ilovehawaian on Aug 2, 2011 12:23:03 GMT -5
mia ilovehawaian thanks for liking my new avi.  What's not to like?  and I'm totes embedding this ^^ from your photobucket ;D |
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rama
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Post by rama on Aug 2, 2011 12:24:14 GMT -5
Since we didn't actually hear Adam talking in this US Weekly article we don't know exactly how he said things or the tone. I thought some things were written very oddly and wondered if what was asked matched what was said in writing. For example at one point he says he faced many obstacles and the next section the first line is I really haven't face many obstacles. I think it is awkwardly written interview.
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Post by justgill on Aug 2, 2011 12:26:11 GMT -5
There are more straight people not getting married than married today.. It's a trend. Adam has said he would like children one day,when he has the time to give them.. I would expect he feels the same about marriage.He is building his career and he's young. I do believe from what I see ,that Adam and Sauli are in love. Why can't they be together without the benefit of Marriage? ITA with you....but....Adam did not say 'I am not ready to consider this at the moment' the way he has said he might like children one day...he said "I do not see marriage in my future"...that is quite a different statement...there are no hedges quoted [and this may be the issue] but no hedges like 'for now' or the 'foreseeable' future or 'at the moment'. Nor did he say 'I don't really see a reason to formalize our/any relationship"...just struck me odd as stated...looked pretty definite. JMHO... I wonder how much the actual wording reported has an impact on what we read into it. In the version I read www.google.com/url?sa=X&q=http://www.usmagazine.com/moviestvmusic/news/adam-lambert-says-he-wont-get-married-201128&ct=ga&cad=CAcQARgBIAAoATAAOABArrXg8QRIAVAAWABiBWVuLVVT&cd=xEgW2hm3Y2U&usg=AFQjCNFKNmH3xLkU1hICJwOscTqzP2AJUwthe key wording was "I don't see myself getting married in the future" That to me sounded as though it needed a qualifier eg "near", "the forseeable" but I didn't see it. Has anyone actually seen/heard him say "my future". |
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Post by mszue on Aug 2, 2011 12:27:53 GMT -5
Adam and Sauli both have careers that they are still establishing and need to devote a lot of time and energy on them. They seem very committed to each other but maybe both feel their lives are not at the 'marriage' stage. They have a lot of time for continued growth in their relationship and, like any other couple, they can make the decision to marry or not when the time is right for them. I really don't feel Adam's statement in the article would be hurtful to Sauli...I just feel they're on the same page about this. JMO HAPPY BIRTHDAY, FEELALIVE!![/size] Hope your day is filled with everything you like to do! MOMTOMANY I PM'd you. [/quote] Goldie Hawn/Kurt Russell Susan Sarandon/Tim ? Johnny Depp/ ? Marriage isn't always the choice or the answer for everyone and I do remember Adam stating that he thinks you can have a number of soulmates in your life who come into your life for a purpose, you both learn and grow from the relationship. I also am sure Adam wouldn't speak carelessly or be insensitive to Sauli in his statements.[/quote] Once again, I agree with you all for the most part. Re Sauli....his visa is very specific and if anything happened to his media status, he would be immediately out of the country. Until he can prove his monetary worth independant of his relationship with Adam...his very visa status is threatened. If they broke up, what do you think the options would be for Sauli in the US? I suspect he would be on the first plane to Finland whether he wanted that or not..... But you are most likely right that they are on the same page. I just do not think you can compare 'made in America' relationships between heterosexual couples with a young gay man in a strange country on a temporary visa. apples and oranges..... it is a very lopsided relationship and Sauli has to feel a little insecure at times, regarless of private committments. Private only goes so far....after all....isn't that a recurring 'gay' theme...the discussion we just had the other day...the ability to be open about our relationships and affections? Marriage is still the essence and epitomy of the PDA. |
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Post by feelalive on Aug 2, 2011 12:28:08 GMT -5
HAPPY BIRTHDAY feelalive!!!!! Have a fun day.. Thanks to all of you for the birthday wishes. This was the first year that I didn't have my beautiful Mother calling to wish me a Happy Birthday. She would always try to be the first. So the last 2 years she called a 12:01. My Mother died this past October after fighting leukemia for 3 years. Coming here and seeing all the wishes feels really great. For my birthday, I want to propose a toast. So lift your glasses with mine in celebration of this warm, caring, intellectual, idea sharing, informative, and yes shallow end enjoying community of people. All here to be a fan of an incredible human being who, even though I am (a little bit) older than, I learn from his bravery, honesty, and wonderful spirit everyday. I feel like AMW in tha it has been a birthday weekend filled with many wonderful Adam gifts that keep on coming. (yes thanks for all the videos and pictures ) Outlaws Of Love - OMG can't stop listening to it! Well instead of just a birthday or birthday week as my husband nieces and nephews called it, I think I will have a great birthday month this year, It is Awesome Adam Month as someone called it prviously. Thanks again to all of you! |
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Post by gelly14 on Aug 2, 2011 12:28:57 GMT -5
mia ilovehawaian thanks for liking my new avi. What's not to like? and I'm totes embedding this ^^ from your photobucket ;D I know! An e-mail just told me that you're following me on photobucket! You're spying on me! ;D |
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seashell
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Post by seashell on Aug 2, 2011 12:29:51 GMT -5
Ah, thanks Star Magazine for bringing back the openly gay singer thing. From now on I am going to address every popstar with the 'openly" prefix...such as Lady Gaga the openly meat wearing singer, Katy Perry the openly whipped cream boob squirting singer and Kesha the openly tone deaf singer.....fabulous.  I KNOW I'M SPAMMING THE THREAD BUT LOLOLOLOLOL CHUNKEY!!!! I LOVE YOU!  Never change.. Chunkey.. I you ETA.. Actually Sauli.. has said the same thing.. just not when he knew Adam... In one of the episodes of BB/or in an interview (josh I am struggling when this occurred sorry) he said .. he wasn't getting married, wasn't going to have a family.. etc.. I was sad when I read it.. Sounded so final. For now they may not even want to entertain it with everything going on..maybe Adam thinks until all states make it legal or the legal at the Fed level....??? oh knows |
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Post by justgill on Aug 2, 2011 12:31:33 GMT -5
Since we didn't actually hear Adam talking in this US Weekly article we don't know exactly how he said things or the tone. I thought some things were written very oddly and wondered if what was asked matched what was said in writing. For example at one point he says he faced many obstacles and the next section the first line is I really haven't face many obstacles. I think it is awkwardly written interview.  |
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With that in mind, I can completely see she and her guy not getting married. In my old age, I have come to the conclusion that unless you want children, getting married just isn't a big deal anymore.
